Wishing for Impossibilites

This life, emotions

Could you have guessed that it would lead to this?

I didn't, I couldn't

I'm a sinner, does that make me bad?

I've hurt you, I feel bad about that, the unintended consequence of my own misery.

What do you say to someone, when you know you've said it all before

when you know you can't give them what they need

when the words run out?

It's hard

The heartaches of living

the mysteries of the soul

the sad misunderstandings

Even when you know that you shouldn't

sometimes you try to work things out

So no one's hurting

but yourself

and then even your truths are lies

all seems wrong

love, a burden

the only recourse, silence

I wish it were not so

Statue

Gazing out the window as though gazing at the dark foreboding sea
Cursed be her thoughts
Cursed be her heart
For cursed is she

A silent thoughtfulness on her face as passerbys scrutinize her face
nothing is revealed save the darkness in her eyes
no nothing can be conveyed but the darkness

Still she stands, as a statue, on watch for the dawn
she stands a martyr to her fate
her words as venom in her heart, a betrayal of her own

Unknowing the power of her words condemn her
knowingly she prays
silence answers
for the inner voice is gone

Abba

Where have I been?

ABBA

My father?

Where have I been?

Torn away from myself, torn apart, torn by life, torn by love

Oh Abba, Abba why is life so hard?

I've failed myself, I've failed you, and all those who love me too.

Abba, Abba, ABBA! My Father!!

Right here, you've been right here
when the silent of the night falls I have held you as you selpt
and the Angels wept as you struggled to stand.

Right here, you've been right here
In my heart, in my soul, I love you

Your voice is not silenced, your silence is heard
daughter, allow yourself to be whole
allow me to heal you

You've done that before, and I faltered Lord, fell

Stand again, I will hold you

but I don't trust myself

Stand and walk I will be right there

Always

Power

For Meaghan...

The power is in her hand
she gasps as she grasps at the pain.

Her palm bleeds
yet she cannot let go.

Who holds the power?
An illusion of the obvious.

A vice tightening
her breath relinquished
her fate sealed.

A gentle kiss from her lovers death.



In the distance the call of a better day
and oft in the distance simplicity looms unaware

In her hand she holds the key, to unlock the pains of with-drawl
she shudders when happiness nears
for tomorrow, tomorrow she'll pay

She cannot say no, she dare not say yes

She grasps with her hand the thorn, the illusory power within
and tries to let go
but cannot.

 Let go
The power is yours

Let go of the thorns

Let go
We stand around you, your support.

Let go...

Silent Truths

It's not often that the night time finds me here, an observer of the obvious, full of obtuse absurdities
along the road the differences shine, minutia in the moonlight
how stifled it feels
here in my box of silence
the box of indecision
of decisions preemptively made
silent words
spoken only yesterday
signposts to the truth
a truth which may never be revealed.

The Psychology of the Animals

Animals that pick on other animals, homeless, mangy animals
the way that they see the myopic strangeness of now
yet often cannot see the obvious
how often they guard and protect
how often they run
how often they cry

they cry because they cannot see

they cry, they cannot see

there is another side

a side you cannot see

Harsh, harsh hurtful infliction

Puncture, wound, maim

Lash out

they say he is insane

and yet they cannot see the wounds, the silence, the wounds

and then the end, the pathos, the end

Silence, lonesome

a howl in the night

pathos denied

the criminal is dead

The others rejoice, he is no more!

gloating silence, he is no more

Ha

and then they see the emptiness

the depths of sorrow they had missed

the silence echos
a refrain of the empty life.

George Michael - Faith

Because the Playlist version went splunk, here is the You Tube video of one of my favorites.